“Just one more profile and I’ll quit,” I tell myself. Yeah, right, who am I kidding?

I need an online dating intervention. Or a miracle.
It’s 2am and I’m wide awake – weary, wired and spun out.
I’ve been swiping for seven hours non-stop with nothing to show for it but an empty bottle of Pinot Grigio, a dull headache, massively dehydrated skin and most likely a trigger thumb. Thanks, Bumble.

My aunt insisted he was perfect for me. Then she tried his vegan macaroons

She lures me to L.A. with the promise of a suitor — not just one but a multitude of hand-picked middle-aged, maybe divorced, probably Jewish and most certainly bitter bachelors. “Santa Monica is teeming with good men your age.” Really? I didn’t get that memo.

Her daily spiel is aggressive, peppered with enticing sound bites meant to convince me that migrating south is the key to finding love. “You’re almost 50. You’ll end up joining an ashram if you stay up there.”
Click here to continue reading in the Los Angeles Times

Posts tagged loss

Why I started writing (and thank god I finally did)

Grief was the catalyst to jumpstart my writing; sharing my voice with others has been proven to be the ultimate creative muse.

Shanti NelsonAugust 12, 2023writing, grief, parents, midlife, menopause, creative muse, writer, loss, family, loveComment

The Boston Globe: On the indignities and joys of solo travel at menopausal midlife

I was five months into my middle-aged gap year, hot-flashing my way around Europe with my surly sidekick, menopause. At 52, I’m taking the trip I never took in my 20s.

Shanti NelsonNovember 9, 2022menopause, solo travel, travel, grief, loss, mother, hot flashes, middle-age, europe, travel writing, writing, humor, humor writing, writer, The Boston Globe, published

The Ashes of Love

I found my mom’s ashes at the foot of my dad’s bed. They were wrapped in her favorite light blue cotton sweater and nestled between a cold hot water bottle and a thick pair of wool socks from REI.

Shanti NelsonSeptember 20, 2022grief, love, loss, parents, death, mom Comments

Banana Cake & the Joy of Loving

He had outlived the love of his life, existing solely in the shadow of his own sorrow, depleted by grief. He’s alone, heartbroken, and already isolated enough as it is. And now, we faced the threat of quarantine looming over our Sunday afternoon routine. It broke my heart wide open.

Shanti NelsonSeptember 17, 2022Joy of Cooking, Banana Cake, Cookbooks, Baking, Chocolate Cake, Covid, recipes, food stories, covid, food writing, Oregon, grief, loss, family, midlife, ageing Comments

The Comfort of Small Things

Shanti NelsonJune 10, 2022Grief, healing, family, self care, self-discovery, loss, childhood home, parents, Finding comfort, Finding Joy, Joy, Happiness, tea, comfort, solaceComment

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Writing

Join me in launching Midlife Bytes on Substack. I appreciate your support (and I promise to make it interesting.

We’re 45 minutes into the job interview and I’ve heard the word “literally” 27 times. And don’t even get me started on “pivot”. I’m about to pivot my 53-year-old keister out of this freakin’ interview. Literally.

“Just one more profile and I’ll quit,” I tell myself. Yeah, right, who am I kidding?

My aunt insisted he was perfect for me. Then she tried his vegan macaroons